CMJ

Back To SINGLE-SHIP.

2011-12-30T23:18:00.002+08:00

I AM SINGLE!
Yes you didn't read it wrongly.
I broke up with Chua Yong An already,
I told him that he leave me hanging for quite long and how long more do I have to keep waiting?
And that he came to a decision to end this relationship, cause he doesn't want to let me wait anymore.
He always had a dream, a dream that he wants to backpack around the country and I didn't like backpacking.
I didn't know what went wrong with our relationship!
I had nothing much to say, really. I just don't ever want to see him again!

And guess what?
My ex-teacher actually thinks that I was the one who is wrong, like what the hell. Her perception is that he is the victim and I am the culprit. If she has this kind of mindset, how could she be a teacher? I mean, she couldn't even keep an eye on her husband. If my attitude makes you have that kind of perception, then I am utterly sorry. But I left because Your husband was doing something that HE WASN'T SUPPOSE TO BE DOING! Bitch.

There's too much to say, really too much.
I think my mind is doing her job by locking up memories, so that I won't have hurt so bad.

It wasn't suppose to be like this, I wanted to spend another few more years with you but, I guess I wont have that chance anymore.

Sometimes I wonder, are you really what I see or do you have a girl outside?
I hate you but I still love you and I am totally disappointed with you.
Sometimes I really hope that you will get into a car accident, but sometimes, I wish that we're back together.
I didn't give what a normal girlfriend would give, but I gave you what a normal girl can't.
I wonder do you really feel nothing at all?
This shit sucks a big time!
Why do we have to end up like this? There are really no hopes?

Would I ever met some good guys?
I'm afraid I won't.

You said you wanted to be good friends after this break up, but I didn't have that courage to do that though. How could I even look at you as a normal best friend? Everytime I saw you, your tweet, everything, reminds me of our relationship, the pain, the broke up.

I can't believe I am back to single, like really don't believe it. I've aready gotten used to having you around, now that you're gone, it feels so weird. It'll be more hurtful to see when you're attached to another girl. I really feel like crying out loud right now, it feel so exhausted.

BIRTHDAY!

2011-12-21T23:54:00.002+08:00

My birthday is coming.
And I still don't know what to do for my birthday.
To book a chalet or just a bbq pit?
But...the chalet has already been fully booked.
Now what?
Bbq sounds a bit weird for a 21st birthday celebration.

2011-12-15T20:29:00.000+08:00

I did myself some thinking this few days, about jobs.
I don't feel like working actually but for the sake of my ticket, sigh.
I didn't quite actually know whether I liked the florist job or not, is just that I am not sure whether I could handle it or not.
For myself, I actually liked jobs that aren't too busy, which is totally have nothing to do. Giving out flyer also seems fun though to some point.

I'm actually quite nervous cause I don't know whether I should take that jobs or not. Sigh. I'm really quite scared though.

2011-12-15T19:52:00.001+08:00

What kind of life does I want?

2011-12-13T18:24:00.000+08:00

Sometime, in life I want it simple, I didn't know what to do in life.
I've always wanted to have the life that I only have a DSLR camera with me everywhere I go, so I could take down all the nice place or even some nice scenery too. But that is way too far from me, I have to be more realistic.

I'll be dropping by Takashimaya tomorrow for an interview at a florist shop, which I don't know will I be able to cope there. I hope I could as there are not much of a choice for me. I'm actually quite nervous, the people there, are they friendly? Will they teach me?

Life, it's easy to be said than done, it's isn't easy. I hate the fact that everything in Singapore is good but there are a lot of foreigners here to find jobs which, locals can't or won't be able to work. Hotels in Singapore have quite a number of foreigners working there too, which likely to leave Singaporean out, as they want an experienced and cheaper form of workers, where Singaporeans are too expensive for them? All this is just my point of view, what I think. It really doesn't matter what I say cause I was just ranting.
But why the government will even let so many foreigner in to their country when his own people is "suffering from a loss of jobs"? I don't think this was even being fair to us, as in like the foreigners are taking up the jobs here as sales assistant, ALMOST EVERYTHING! They have the experience so they'll get the job pretty easy, but what will happen to those teenager who is looking for sales assistant job and she just came out to work and no one wants her because she got no experience? She'll be jobless if every shop, retail or boutique is hiring mostly foreigners. If you think that what I say was not true, think! Do you see foreign lady/guy working in a retail everywhere? "Welcome to _______?(phillippine tone)" I am truly amazed by how Singaporean shops without even noticing the salesgirl. Anyway, if the G didn't let those foreigners into Singapore, then their salary would not be to high right?

How much I didn't like "F.T." couldn't be describe in this post, it's just too much. I just couldn't accept the fact that government taking in those foreigner and said it's for those job that Singaporean don't want. Does that includes sales, offices work, everything? I am not criticizing about them, I know some of them are university graduates but they just give me a kind of feeling that Singapore's standard is DROPPING. \
Sometimes, I think, why aren't I born in other country, but it will not be as safe as in Singapore, though there are lots of foreigh "TALENT" here.

IHATEITSOMUCH!

The Nagging.

2011-12-12T22:50:00.000+08:00

Yes. The nagging s back.
That is what I am very, very bored about.
Stressed about looking for a job, cause I really don't know what to do now.
To look for a part-time job or a full-time job?
It s very hard to make the decision.
Cause it's for the next few years of my life, so I had to think hard.
sigh.

Relationship.

2011-12-07T13:52:00.001+08:00

Relationships.

- Are they good or bad?

- What they brought to you in the end? Is it Love or hatred?

- Did they bring you happiness or suffering?

- Are they for long or are they for short?

Ever thought of those question? Or these question,

- Is he keeping another girl behind your back?

- Does he still in love with you?

- Did he commit into the relationship?

- Are you irritating him when you're asking lots of question out of concern?

- Is he playing or he is being serious in this relationship?

- Is he flirting with some other girls while you're not beside him?

So on and so forth...

Men are one thing that is difficult to understand, both thoughts and personality (well not all of them are). Usually they'll say girls are the most difficult thing to understand, which keeps me thinking. Girls, may seems picky on the outside but on the inside, they still longed for the same things that every girl wants- L.O.V.E!

Some times, when a guy unknowingly does something that was seems as a "no longer interested" things to a girl's perspective and was it the girl fault to ever thought of the question?

There are different kind of girl in this world, more that I haven't met of but I'm sure that what they wants in a relationship is Trust, Faith, and LOVE.

Relieved~

2011-11-05T01:27:00.001+08:00

Finish exams, and now wishing i could pass **hope** **hope**
Hope I don't fail, cause I dreamt of a really bad dream this morning, i dream that I fail my paper and got only 5 mark for it! Oh my god right?

I see the ending of exams now! (:

2011-11-01T02:04:00.001+08:00

I can see days after my exams! And I have a sudden rush of happiness. On top of that, my 2 years with Chua Yong An is coming soon! I am so happy that I can be together for so long(: but there's still a long road ahead of us! Which I am very happy about. I've asked him whether does he looked forward to our 2 year anniversary, he said yes and it's a long, very long time! And I told him that I'm very happy to be with him and wanted to walk down the road along with him. It seems a bit of a old sentence but it meant a lot. I hope that'll cheer him up? Cause I'd never met up with him for so long! And I didn't know what he's thinking now.
Julia told me that he's not close to Yong min and jiawei, I can see that though I also didn't know the reason. I feel down and kept questioning myself, why is it so?
I would wanna know why either.
Apart from that, he's text at times sounds bored to me, always giving me the cold feeling but I didn't know whether was it me or what. Never really told him any of this is because I didn't wanna have conflict and we have never been meeting up, so I'm afraid that would affect the relationship. I know that I should've told him, maybe you could see that as I didn't wanna give him anymore problems cause his school work might be quite a lot and is quite busy. The thing I fear most is what I dreamt this morning, never meeting up for a long time and he found another girl. And guess what it came into my dream. In my dream, it was like this, I was walking on the street and coincidentally, I met him on the road junction. And I'm about to call out to him when he called out to me with...a girl beside him...holding hands. I looked at him and knew at once what was happening, so I greeted and congratulated him on a new girl. And I left after he thanked me, and told him I've urgent things to do. At that moment, I knew I was being dumped, still acting as if I'm alright after that dramatic break up. Right after that, I dreamt that I was walking all over the place like the time won't start moving, and it's still afternoon. Then, I walk into a building, a company looking place(i wonder why did I go there for?) apparently, my "ex-boyfriend" was there too. Embarrassed, he talked to me and I asked him when did it start and all kinds of question. And I left without knowing what kind of place is that=.=
Weird time to have a dramatic dream.

This few days, I'll have to memorize the 5 exam focus by hook or by crook! Because I have not much time left. Wish me tons and tons and tons and tons of LUCKS!

And I hope the dream is really opposite from reality! Hahaha, I didn't want that kind of dramatic ending though it's kinda interesting LOL

Hopes? Is it real?

2011-10-29T00:39:00.001+08:00

Is there such a thing call hope?
I wonder, at times when we need it will it get to us? Or it's never there all along?

I really wish that there are such a thing call hope, then I could ask it to help with my exam passing rates. I know I should've studied earlier, it's just that the motivation are gone after the first paper and are not eager to finish because I have to look for jobs afterwards. Everything seems so fast nowadays, is like one year is passing way faster then the other.
I can't help but to pray, and wish that every gods I've prayed could help me get through this and get a job. I know it sounds a bit impossible and ridiculous at the same time, but I just believe.

All the while I yearn for is only leisure, pleasure and more fun. I've never really sat down and think, think about what I should do in the future. Never give a thought about my future, and now with this ending, I couldn't blame anyone but myself.
The only question I would ask myself is "will I be a useful person in the future?" indeed this question was the most difficult ones.
Life's is not great, everybody have their own fate, whether you are born rich or poor, clever or dumb. There will always be a simple question that bothers you, which is "whether I can do it or not?" It's not something that you've owned the moment you're born. Things have to be learn, but why I didn't live the way I just talked? It's because I can't do it, I'm not determine enough to do everything, anything, even stepping out of my comfort zone or even step out the first step or on my own.

Sometimes, I find that there are a lot of bad things about me. Despite having not the ability to study, the first step to work, independent, and not intelligent of course! My sister always say take things one by one, don't rush through all of the things. It's kinda true, you know?
I found myself nagging more only when I had exams going on, the moment where I had to study and lost my freedom. That's where I thought of my life
Exams are like a death sentence to me. Never in help but kills me most.

Exams are boring

2011-10-07T17:10:00.000+08:00

Yupp, you heard that alright!
Exams are coming, and i haven't even got prepared for it. It's on 24 oct, like 2 weeks later? 2 weeks how am I gonna study, like where is the time? It's not like this, if i had studied earlier, i wouldn't have this problem, it lies on my self-discipline. If I'd studied earlier, i woudn't be afraid now right?
And guess what? marketing's on 24 and pbm is on 4 november. I'm doomed!

Kids....Irritating things.

2011-09-20T13:45:00.000+08:00

Recently, there was a little boy staying at my estate, living as the same level as I am. He started to scold my dog, he said "Shut up la, don't bark la!" right at my door step! What the hell right? I thought he was a kid that is quiet, unknowingly, he said all that pile of shit. Who do you think you are, scolding my dog? Do you know why dog bark at the first place? They bark cause they don't find you familiar or you irritates them. And if you wants attention, get it from your parents! We don't have that type of attention for you nor do we have to give you our attention, you fucking bastard! If I hear you scold one more time, I'll make sure you shut the fuck up! I have the right to tell your parents, but I didn't want to make our relationship as neighbour sour, and that I decided to not to. You ought to learn your lesson, in Singapore, not everybody likes that and that doesn't mean that I like it. Others would directly called the police and tell them you're harassing them! Every time you scolded my dog, I get so pissed, you scolding my dog it's just like scolding me. You better know where you stand, for as long as your parent lives. You never got scolding before huh? bastard.

2011-09-20T13:31:00.000+08:00

Weather now in Singapore seems a little bit weird. It's not monsoon season yet but it kept raining, I miss shopping days, I have been staying at home for a couple weeks. I'm going to watch F1 for the first time in my life! I am so happy, the ticket was given by Julia's aunty, thank you(:

18 September 2011

2011-09-14T22:51:00.000+08:00

Just 4 more days Baby will be back in town! I so excited, didn't get to see him for 2 weeks really kill man! But what to do, after this he still have to go camp, which was the most boring part. :(

Hazy, Hazy day~

2011-09-14T22:46:00.001+08:00

This few days, so many people got ill because of the hazy caused by the fire in Indonesia. The haze was really unbearable. My nose was exceptionally irritated by that, and now I can feel my throat is starting to hurt, might not be the haze but by the food I consumed.
The news said that Singapore zoo cancelled the celebration of Halloween as they did celebrate every year. I forgot the reason why, but lots of people who bought the ticket just for that wanted Singapore zoo to refund their money.
Life is as bored as it is now, I should be doing assignment now instead of blogging and twittering. But just don't know how to start that assignment. Or simply one word to describe, Lazy.

Ugly- 2NE1♡

Welcome To My World. Suckers!

2011-09-13T08:12:00.000+08:00

I have the feeling to blog, but I didn't know what to blog about. Cause I really had nothing to say anymore. Life is not wonderful now, air's polluted, my chest hurts, my menses came, baby's not in town, family quarreling. I can say that "I'M NOT FINE, AND I'M NOT GOOD!" Everyday/Every weekends, I have to see faces of my sister who is very unwilling to accompany my mother, who is easily mad over something and does not bounce back to normal. I'm afraid my heart can't take it, you know? I know that every home has it's own problem, I knew that! But I didn't expect it to happen every week. I didn't created these problems, I didn't wanna start a fight, I didn't even got you mad in the first place. Fancy throwing your tantrum over your family? I had enough of all this shit alright. I have my rights too, it's not like I'm living without any worries, you don't know how hard is it. I didn't want all this, who started it in the first place? Got angry over going out, having the need to go over Vivo to buy moon cakes? And too stubborn to just text over a message asking people who are home to help you with the laundry? Get it over and be done with it. I didn't wanna say this, but keeping inside my heart is like damaging my own body. All of this anger, where can I release them? I can't. Cause I don't have the rights to even get angry. You're the oldest one, you should know what's right and what's wrong? It's not like you can't push the status at home around and making someone to be the eldest leading other sisters. I simply didn't like this, at times like this, I really feel like giving up and sit at one corner, hiding. Hiding from all nonsense, quarrels, fight, everything.
I HAD ENOUGH OF ALL THIS KIND OF SHIT. seriously.

Epic fail

2011-09-08T14:07:00.000+08:00

Today is another boring day. I went to school thinking that there's lesson today but I didn't realize that PBM lesson has been exchange with Econ's lesson so I stupidly step into the classroom and saw Lee Siao Sing teaching with the same pattern.

Sat on a bench chit chat with an uncle who lived as the same block as me, was chit chatting till uncle is time to start work so i went home. Bought a pandan cake for daddy for breakfast, then walked home. Weather is so warm, it's been like this for a few days now. Hope the weather gets better, if not all would be barbecued.

Girls that wont start talking

2011-09-07T22:39:00.005+08:00

This few days has happened quite a lot of things. I have nothing to say especially when we didn't even say about you. You said "Seriously, never even started anything, they already got something to say about my burnt hand." Like seriously? Did you even think that why would we even want to say about your god damn hand? I'm laughing out loud now seriously. I've never seen someone so dumb before, I thought you are a quite okay friend but, really cannot judge a person by their looks man! You seems so nice, but in your twitter, blog, and Facebook you can be so violent.

I had enough of you for now, and I'm not gonna treat you and your good friend as a "FRIEND" now, for good.

Good thing that you're out of my friend list now, cause I don't have to think what to talk to you and even posted my name on your twitter saying that I keep asking you to talk!

I want my freedom.

2011-09-03T15:03:00.002+08:00

Freedom is what I always wanted, but I have to be home taking care of daddy. I know I should be the one taking care of him since nobody can, but everyday is just so boring. Okay, he's home also bored and I knew that.

Oh my god, I feel like shopping so much! It's not very used to staying home almost everyday during weekdays. Met up with Willy, Miranda and Julia last Thursday thought that school is open but it's isn't. So we went over Clementi MacDonald for chat and drink. And we talked about a lot of things, and talking to Willy is so damn funny!

Ah, so sleepy now! I feel like sleeping.

All is Tan.

2011-08-28T22:18:00.003+08:00

President election day is over, and Tony Tan got it.

Although I haven't got a chance to vote for who I wanna vote for, but I am still pretty disappointed by the result. And that, I probably have to see him everyday in school and class and everywhere. For crying out loud.

I really had a busy day and a pretty busy week, taking care of my dad and sister. I think my skin not very good already. Did quite a lot of things today, and all is helping out my mum in burning paper money for my grandma and grandpa, prepare dinner. Damn, my hiccup is not going away.

I wanna watch "Final Destination 5", but Funshion have the show so I didn't know to watch it free or watch it in cinema with the effect?

My dad haven't finish bathing yet, I haven't bath yet. And his show started already, daddy loves to watch the show "Wonderful World" on channel 8.

YAY, DADDY COME OUT ALREADY!

Ta-Ta, I go bath already(:

saranghea!

Boring days/weeks

2011-08-23T18:16:00.002+08:00

Indeed boring, didn't went shopping for like a few weeks already and I'm suffering from NSS(no shopping syndrome) I am so fainting but luckily this saturday i was allowed to go out for my friend's birthday(:

No good, no good!

2011-08-16T01:52:00.002+08:00

My dad fell down yesterday at work. He tripped over by a trolley, and fell on the floor of the loading bay. Went to see a doctor at NUH already, doctor says he's fine after checking his blood test, urine test and an X-RAY.

2011-08-02T17:52:00.002+08:00

The HDB now in Singapore looks like condominium, imagine if 5 or 10 years later, those people living in HDB have the pass code lock? Ha ha, cool right? Then we don't have key anymore, and simply have to change the pass code like once a week to prevent others to break in! Ha, what a great idea i have! But what will condominium be if housing estate is just like them? But then, condominium would have a greater invent, right? Like thumb print, hand print, eye scanner? Who knew right? One code for all, example, the main door to the building, the lift and the unit door. I've always wanted a door with coded lock cause it look cool.

2011-07-22T14:28:00.002+08:00

WHEN IS FT ISLAND COMING BACK TO SINGAPORE?

I miss them so much already.

Days are till the same though dates of schooling is coming near, my sis still insist on me going work. But in such a short period of time, what could I do?

I seriously hate the hate of having 3 older sister sometimes.

2011-07-07T03:14:00.003+08:00

Dear Mother,

When it comes to life, I had nothing but a blanked mind. I was like any other teenager who wants to play. I did not know what responsibilities were, a lot of thing seems unfamiliar. I did not try to look for what I was interested in and nearly spent two years wasting my life. Sometime, life is not pointed out by god about which way we should be taking, it has to be taught by ourselves. Though I have not been doing that, but sooner or later, I’m going to learn that too.

Through the twenty years of my life, I felt nothing but a useless child using her mother’s cash. Although my mother did not say out loud that he wanted me to go work and get independent, I still knew. I was too dependant on my mother, for almost everything, from cash to living. And someday, I heard one of my friends said about another friend of mine “She is still getting her allowance from her parent, won’t she feel embarrassed?” and yup, I do get embarrassed. I was too comfortable in my comfort zone, just way too comfort.

My mother was very protective of me; she wants me by her side all the time when I was young. I kind of miss that now, but we don’t have the chance to be this way again. I still remember she still have to work to earn extra cash in order to have enough cash to spend. And all I could do was to spent her money away, I often thought other people’s mother was wonderful but my mother was terrific. What she did was all because of me, she knows that her other three daughter are capable and have no worries but only me.

There was a time, when she went out shopping with my sisters, she would remember that my watch had spoil and would buy one for me to wear. Up till now, I still feel very touched. I often got irritated by her when she got angry, but she just wanted to say her point of views. She’s 62 years old this year, her skin getting more wrinkles, and getting more white hairs, her memories might get weak and her bone might get soft. I just don’t want to lose her.

Among me and my sister, I was her “Apple of her eye” and she loved me a lot but she also loved my sisters. Every time when I told her something good, she will be very happy for me. And I know that she do not want me to do something that make her depress, or sadden her.

She was the best mother I’ve ever known. I know everything I do seem nothing to me, but it seems everything to her.

Every time when I was studying late for my exams, she would ask me to sleep early and did not want me to tire myself out. And every time, I would ask myself “have you treat her good enough? Have you respected her? Am I being filial?” All of this question, did they pop-up in your mind before?

Anyway, Mum I know I’ve quarreled with you sometimes, I don’t mean them. I did make you angry and I am sorry about that. I did make you worry about me too, mum don’t worry about me anymore because I’ve grown up.

Dear Mum, I love you.
You didn’t know that because I have not told you. Although every day, you will call me in the afternoon to wake me up, I told you it was like a alarm clock to me but I did look forward to you calling because I know you’re alright. Every night, you woke up at 3.30AM just not to let yourself woke up late for work, I knew. You work 12 hours a day, cleaning the office, telling us it’s for the fun because staying home is boring. But Mum, this work is too tiring? Every time, whatever I want, you’ll try and get for me. I am grateful for what you have done for me, and I really appreciate everything. For the reason why I did not wear the watch is because I want to keep it, I didn’t want to spoil it. Though battery will run out, but the memories will still be there.

I love you Mummy,

Sincerely,
MeiJuan

Peeved

2011-07-05T07:55:00.000+08:00

A pot calling a kettle black.

2011-07-02T00:34:00.002+08:00

Did really nothing for this few days.

I was suppose to be looking for jobs, but it kinda went out of my mind.

My sis sure is gonna kill me.

2011-06-27T23:05:00.002+08:00

Sub-papers are over, like finally?

I felt so relax, went shopping with darling today.

I went to Chin swee road to accompany mum to see doctor at 11 but waited till around 11.50 then done, then went over to the foodcourt for lunch but she had her lunch. After that, mum took cab back to work, and I took 51 to change 111 to Ghim moh, cut my hair, and took passport photo. Then went to clementi, had sumo house for lunch. Bought my bag, then went IMM, bought a new maxi. Spent all of my cash today:(

I MISS THEM!

2011-06-12T15:38:00.001+08:00

THIS ARE ALL MY FAVOURITE SONG!

2011-06-12T14:48:00.003+08:00

2 paper has pass, and I feel a sense of relieve, cause I'm left with 1 paper!

And gosh, I feel happy.

Yesterday went out with baby, it was so fun, though didn't quite bought anything but I bought a new pouch to put my make up and i love it so much cause the pattern was horse(: There was so many, so many nice pattern.

After sleeping for the whole night and morning, I still feel tired and I don't know why. Probably I didn't sleep well last few nights, and that's why I got headache every now and then. And I often get flu on Sunday only, and I still don't know why is it only occur on Sunday. I feel like visiting Bukit Batok out of a very, very sudden!

Did nothing today, went to blk 40 estate's market to have lunch,

I had Kwey Chap.

Blanco Court's Kwey Chap, for me it's nice and the portion is also quite big.

That market has a very famous roasted pork and roasted chicken/duck rice that is really can die for! The queue is always very long and the crowd is always coming.

Don't know why I keep talking about food,

probably is that I had nothing more to say.

So that, I am going to stop here.

Love me, Love me,

say that you love me♥

我好讨厌考试喔！

2011-06-10T09:38:00.000+08:00

每一次考试时，我一定好好好讨厌喔！因为会牺牲我的自由，不能出外游玩。和错过了好几次的活动哦！真是气死我了啦！还偏偏在我考试时GSS，真是倒楣。没的出去，我已经快要风了！心情是曹不好的咯（-_-）_|_
有这么多东西要记，我脑袋都要爆了啊！好几次都劝自己说，只是这三张考卷而已把了，努力读就好了啊，没有一次做的到。我好伤心啊，有没有人来急我呀？
今天，baby来找我，感觉上好象有好多好多话想跟他说可是一见到他就好象全没了，好神奇哦！：）

I just want a simple life.

2011-06-08T08:57:00.000+08:00

How I wish exams would be like twitter, Facebook or blogger! Then I'll pass very easily. And I should be concentrating on my studying instead of this right? So Ta-Ta, off studying!

WORRIED

2011-05-30T09:18:00.000+08:00

I am worried, I don't wanna let my parent down again. But where can I find my motivation?
Is it that hard to concentrate on the textbook? huh MeiJuan? Is it that hard just to remember all those for just a week?
Did I just screwed up my studies?
Life is no longer Mr Nice anymore, but it could never be Mr Nasty!
I am so scared of this time's sub paper, I'm scared that history wil happen again. I don't wanna remodule! It is so expensive to remodule, it cost $321 Sin dollar! I always thought that life would be easy, it's never to tough for me, but this time I was wrong. Tough decision everytime when it comes to study, I choose Hospitality, travel and tourism because I quite like the way hotel works by looking on the outside, but when I got in to this course and knew the inside, I got frightened. there are so many things to be done(though courses don't actually tell us what will they have or what will they do) and sadly this course or this school doesn't have attachment(school sending us to company to work as an experience).
My heart was so down now that I have to wait for August 8 to start my remodule.
I didn't dare to tell my family that I was scared, afraid and worried.

Anyway, clear my 3 papers first.

AND I WILL NOT FORGET, 2 more days to my 1 year and 7 month ANNIVERSARY!

WORRIED

2011-05-30T09:02:00.000+08:00

I am worried, I don't wanna let my parent down again. But where can I find my motivation?
Is it that hard to concentrate on the textbook? huh MeiJuan? Is it that hard just to remember all those for just a week?
Did I just screwed up my studies?
Life is no longer Mr Nice anymore, but it could never be Mr Nasty!
I am so scared of this time's sub paper, I'm scared that history wil happen again. I don't wanna remodule! It is so expensive to remodule, it cost $321 Sin dollar! I always thought that life would be easy, it's never to tough for me, but this time I was wrong. Tough decision everytime when it comes to study, I choose Hospitality, travel and tourism because I quite like the way hotel works by looking on the outside, but when I got in to this course and knew the inside, I got frightened. there are so many things to be done(though courses don't actually tell us what will they have or what will they do) and sadly this course or this school doesn't have attachment(school sending us to company to work as an experience).
My heart was so down now that I have to wait for August 8 to start my remodule.
Anyway, clear my 3 papers first.

AND I WILL NOT FORGET, 2 more days to my 1 year and 7 month ANNIVERSARY!

我的路呢？

2011-05-20T08:21:00.000+08:00

对我的路呢？
每个人重是说＂生命短短几十年，应该开心的过，做一些不可能做到的事情。＂可是，在人还茫茫的道路中难免会迷失了路，而我，就是迷失了我该走的路。没次都告诉自己说＂美娟，你行的，没什么事是难不倒你的。＂但我是太单纯了，很想出外打工的我却没有哪个意志力，没那个战斗心。从小到大，妈妈都很保护我，关心我，可能是这样我才不敢往外闯。又有人说＂老天爷创造的人，没有一个被忽略，每个被他创造的都会有自己发达/出人头地的一天。那我呢？我都已经二十岁了，还没找到属于我的放象。老天爷是不是已经忘记了我，或许他已经放弃我了？我念书又念不好，有会花钱，浪费自己的时间。看谁都受不了啦！连我都受不了，

2011-05-11T13:15:00.002+08:00

Hello, I'm back.

There will aways be stress where ever I go, it's like leeches, sticking to me all the time. But all this stress could be solve, but not at once. I have to re-module for two sub which I've failed. Take 3 sub paper for the 3 paper which I fail. Can you believe it? After studying it for like how many days, the result came back is a pile of shit.

Just yesterday, Aveline(the girl whom I once "hated") send me a SMS, asking me whether did I re-module for my paper, I've deleted her number so that is why I didn't know it's her. So I replied "you are?" and she says Aveline. That was the time felt so OMG + disgusted + it must be a nightmare + questions= TOTALLY CAN'T BELIEVE IT! If you had some person which you do not like them texted you, how will you feel? I'm not trying to say that she isn't good, in fact, that Case Study assignment was half done by her and the part she done, I didn't know how to do. Okay enough of the assignment.

Elections have pass, but why do some people doesn't like PAP? I didn't quite like them though I love LKY! If you read up on the history of Singapore, you'll know what I mean by that. He help Singapore in so many ways, things that sometimes people can't even do. If only I knew him, I would have love to have him as my grandfather^^

And the Ting Pei Ling was another joke, "er...er,..I don't know what to say(stomp feet, stomp feet) ?"

Though I am not under Holland-Bukit Timah already and I'm under Tanjong Pagar. I felt so sad, cause I'm so proud of staying here in Holland Close. Lim Swee Say has been transfer to East Coast and We're under this guy call Mr Chan, Ki Qiu(watch youtube for his speech). I wanna be name under Holland-Bukit Timah again, but I don't wanna move out of Holland. Tough decision it is.

Workers are here doing wiring, and I am down here blogging, they are changing the main wire to new one, he says that the old wire was too small, can't hold up for higher usage. And the new one much bigger in size, could be used even the current is small. Though I can't really understand what he is trying to explain, but I learnt about wire before, if I am not wrong ITE days.

Guess this is all I wanna say, though is quite long but do read up on the history of Singapore eh? :D

Damn

2011-05-05T14:51:00.003+08:00

One result came, and it wasn't good.

I fail my communication management, what should I do?

I suddenly felt as though I had taken all of this stuff too easily, taken this things for granted.

Besides, studies wasn't my priority then. Guess I'll have to pay S$32.10, and depends on how many subject I fail. Geez!

2011-05-01T03:12:00.002+08:00

I've been watching a new Korean drama, the girl in that movie was day dreaming all the time! Just like me? Nah, though I love to day dream very much. But she likes this guy who is from the same school for like 3 years? And the name of the show is "Playful Kiss", it is like the Chinese show 惡作劇之吻!

They are learning Math, English, and oh my god, I return it to my teacher once I finished Secondary! And hasn't been touching them since, I really miss those days man~

The days of renovation is coming! That means I'm doom!

I don't even know what to do with my dog! And how noisy would it be?

BORING, 10 days of work where it could be done within days!

2011-04-30T02:38:00.002+08:00

I've been looking into the past for this two days now, and I found out that, I looked much nicer now, but my temper was better back then. Life was really unpredictable when it comes to your own life. Sometimes, it may happen some good stuff that you'll never forget, or it might happen some bad stuff that you'll never forget.

Things back then are much simpler, not now, a word for it is complex. And complexity leads us nowhere.

I remember, I used to meet up with Julia at certain part to shop and we'll definitely enjoy it cause we have each other's company. Days are so relax, and more often, things are not meant to do haven't been done yet.

Just 2 more days away, my 1 year and 5 months with baby.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY in advance if I happen to forget it(:

We have been together for very long already, been through thick and thin of relationship and love. As days goes by, he'll be busy with studies, I'll be busy with work, but no matter, we'll still fight for this relationship for I am the one you've said I am. Life's have to consist more of understanding now, as polytechnic, this poly have a very interesting things in there. Interesting until I was amazed, and I don't know why either.

Yesterday was Prince William and Princess Katerine( pardon me If I am wrong) wedding. It was so glamorous and spectacular. I too, would like to have a wedding like this, but I would never fit into a princess catalogue, and for friends who knew me, they'll know why. Their wedding was so enchanting, it's just like a dream come true for every girl in the world, handsome prince. I went in to day dreaming mode ever since the wedding life telecast was over. CONGRATULATIONS(:

I am only 20 year old, and still young. I don't wanna get married so early, I still wanna play first. I can't imagine what would it be like to have my own wedding. It'll be nice, of course it would be..

2011-04-28T02:12:00.002+08:00

What am I suppose to do when I had nothing to do?

Act like I am busy? Hell no....

Try to find things to do? I'm too lazy for that...

No nothing? And got nag,nah.....

Then what am I suppose to do?

God damn it, I felt so weird out of a sudden like now, things wasn't suppose to happen this way kind, you know?

What could I do to stop that feeling?

2011-04-27T02:36:00.001+08:00

Am I wasting my life away?

I'm doing nothing everyday, just surfing the net and watching show. What kind of life am I leading?

2011-04-26T01:58:00.003+08:00

Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.
- Captain Corelli's Mandolin6. "Love is the beauty of the soul."
--St. Augustine

Am I a filial daughter?

2011-04-22T01:01:00.003+08:00

I still haven't found any job yet, and I am sure my second sister is so gonna nag at me a few more hours later. I had that feeling way to strong.

Bored is one word I have to say now, nothing to do at home, sisters doesn't lets me out, so pathetic right?

Living like this is just like living in the prison, except that this is a home.

Sometimes, I really didn't what they want from me, it's just like whatever I do, they doesn't likes it. Oh my life is pathetic alright.

At times, I talk to myself, about why am I living in this world?

What would they be like if I'm dead?

What would it be like if, I'm not born?

What would it be like if, I am more useful?

I once asked my mummy a few questions.

"Mummy, what if I was never born?"

"Mummy, if I was not here, you wouldn't have to waste so much money on me, like the school fees, food, clothes, accessories, etc."

"Mummy, am I being Filial?"

My mum didn't answer me that.

A few days later, she says, " What should I do if I don't have you, no daughters would accompany me to the market, nobody would have accompany me to block 40 to help me carry stuff, no one would ever wanna go, only you, girl, would wanna accompany me to market, block 40, and everywhere. Tell me, what should I do without you?"

But I still felt useless, not working at the age of 20, and still using my mum's money. Hah, what a filial daughter uh? If I am, what makes you so sure when I, myself could not possibly believe that?

Everywhere I go, anybody I meet, are working, I felt so ashame of myself. I am not filial, not that I starts to work and earn my own income to support myself.

I know it's a long post, and for those who wants to continue reading please bear with this for a little more.

So many years my mum have been spending money on me, since I was very, very young. My sister told me when there was this fight, that whenever my mum goes out shopping with them, and anything she saw that is pretty, she'll tend to buy them for me, and ask whether I would like the gift that she's buying for me. Every time I think of this, my eyes teared for what I've done to her. Any time when she heard that my watch spoiled, or whatever things I needed, it pops out of her head when she is shopping. And, every time I went shopping, I didn't buy her anything. I felt so guilty, for not treating her better, for not respecting her sometimes, and finds her naggy at times.

I'm so sorry mummy, I wanted to ask you to forgive me for all this that I've done , will you forgive me?

For I was the apple of your eyes.

2011-04-20T19:29:00.001+08:00

This song is so sad, I nearly cried watching and listening to it.

2011-04-20T02:25:00.002+08:00

Day after day, the coming back of my second sister is getting nearer and nearer. And I haven find a job yet, she sure will scold me.

Nowadays, the weather in Singapore had been horrendously hot and humid. The sky is clear blue with little cloud, clouds that not enough to cover the sun. So everyone, put on sun block before you go out.

2011-04-19T01:49:00.004+08:00

I have been wondering, what if the world ends right now, what will happen?

As there have been rumors saying that they had seen UFO in the sky, but are they real?

In the picture, I can see peace, beauty, and gentle in the woods, rivers and seas. Could you

imagine what will happen when all this are gone, and human perished?

Why can't people just stop hurting the Earth?

Stop all the wars, burnings, fightings, and start protecting this planet, don't wait until somethings happen then makes you realize what you've done. The Earth can't tells you that she is suffering, but it can show signs and symptoms that she is not happy, can't you all see this?

What I think is that human is too selfish, and could only just think for themselves. Thinking that, if I'm the only one person doing this in this area, it won't affect much but, you're absolutely wrong about that. Even if throwing rubbish on the floor, but not the bin, can also playing part in dirtying or pollute the area.

I don't know what will happen if world ends really happen, what should we do?

I have not a clue.

Am I thinking too much, or am I hallucinating?

是轻松呢还是一个不容易过的日子呀？

2011-04-14T09:30:00.000+08:00

这个假期过得可真痛苦啊、姐姐一直要我找工作做。是对呀，好过我一整天都在家里浪费时间，不如出去做工赚钱。可是我现在是实在懒惰呀！只想出门逛街，那里会想到会去做工呢？

How I wish in this world there are nothing call work. But, there is sadly. What job should I do?
I definitely have no idea.
Why does I have to work?
Cause my re-module fee cost S$321!
damn, schooling in Singapore is so expensive, tsk!
So tired of spending 14 years if my life just studying. I wanna have fun, if not I'll definitely regret it when I gets older.

Life is getting no where better, Singapore getting more boring as days goes by. It's so small, all shopping malls have already walked/shopped a million times. I wanna go overseas, damn it. There's lots of places that I wanna go, lots of fun that I wanna enjoy, but too bad, I'm born with no special talent, can't earn from that point to get loads of cash to travel, travel and travel! Never mind, as people says, being poor is not a bad thing, at least you're really being happy.

In Singapore, everything you wants, you have to earn it to get it. But, I'm proud to be a Singaporean, at least Singapore is a very safe country, walking on the street in the middle of the night won't have any problems cause patrol cops are always on the look out! Safe it is(: Though everything here is so expensive:/
Singapore is my home, the place where I belong! I'm glad that there are so many foreigner visiting Singapore! Good, cause we really changed a lot!

God, how did I even link to this?

Alright then, let's continue!
There are some people living in Singapore who are not mentally or physically taught well. And that, I meant, if you happen to be in Singapore, take a seat somewhere and observe the people around you. What they did and what they should not be doing. Like uncles spitting into the drains. Not giving up seats to those who need it more in train and buses. Didn't apologies for something that they have done. More and more foreign workers are coming into Singapore for jobs and most of them won't smile or apologies too! All this are things that happen everyday, it happens on me too, at times!

Oops, isn't my post getting a little bit naggy? Then I shall stop here and get some sleep, cause the time now is 2AM, and this post will take time to be posted so, Ta-Ta!

2011-04-12T22:57:00.002+08:00

Yupp, kick back and relax as exams are over.

But I think that I still have to re-module one subject, and it cost S$321/-.

But in the mean time, I have to work in order to have an income and the money to pay for that. But I can't imagine working in retail shop. How?

As days goes by, I just wanna relax and relax and relax. What I wanna do is to shop and shop and shop. And what I wish to do is play and play and play.

Life is great, but I wish it will go my way. Man, How I love holidays!

I saw so many foreigner in Singapore(not China, Philippine, or whatever), it's Americans all this! It all came out after one of my friends have a American boyfriend. Holland Village have a lot when it's in the night. Some are so handsome, smart, cute!

Last Saturday, my friends and I went for a steamboat dinner! It was so fun, as we exchange conversation and did took a lot of photographs.I didn't ate much as we are laughing almost every minutes. Wasn't it be great if time stops at that point of life?

There was this thing about my mum that I think it's very cute, she has been asking for KFC for a few weeks already and hasn't had it. and she was asking where's my KFC:(

Forgive and Forget

2011-04-07T11:19:00.000+08:00

I've forgive you, and I hope that there will not be anything like this. Cause I've placed lots of love in this relationship.
I placed so much that I don't even know whether those that I gave worked out. I don't wanna loose you, and therefore, I'm not losing you.

I Don't Wanna Have Another Disappointment.

Nor do I wanna have the most painful time in my life.
Days that you didn't text me, don't you miss me? Or are you too engross in your camp? Which is correct?
Baby, I don't want a plain promises. I want it straight from your heart.

I don't know what's single anymore, I have been so used to being with you, not alone in my life, but I just can't take it if I'm single.

Baby, what are you doing when you didn't text me?

You went to a friends home at Simei, is it a girl one or a guy one? I know I'm asking too much question, but I think I should know this?

2011-04-03T00:14:00.002+08:00

Wooo! I'm left with only one paper to go, and today's paper is like shit, I didn't know how to do at al and seriously, the time they given us to study is like so short, I guess I'll have to remodule for marketing.

4 down, 2 to go.

2011-04-01T11:44:00.001+08:00

Yupp, cleared 4 paper and now left with 2 sub paper. If I was to do better last term, I wouldn't have to take sub-paper now, could even enjoy life.
I wanna change blogsong too, lots of things I wanna do(mostly shopping)! Damn, this exam thing is making me^ sick!
Saying about that, I should really cut down on supper! And get myself a FBT short and start jogging! LOL, I told myself countless time, and guess what, I didn't achieve that goal.
It might be another long post, but I'm not so sure. The only thing that's in my mind now is holiday, shopping, shopping and shopping. Nothing else.
Haha!

I MISS YOU!
Another day without a text, hmm I understand cause it's GL camp(:

2011-03-29T00:26:00.002+08:00

Days are more relax now as three papers have passed.

But there are three more to come, marketing was definitely a subject that I didn't know I would have a re-test for it. I hate having a re test after four of the subject I am studying on this term and no time to study for it. Damn those management who sset the date of the sub-papers.

The weather is very warm now, I am perspiring like there's no tomorrow.

LET ME HAVE A BREAK! CAN?

2011-03-28T11:05:00.000+08:00

I just wanted some break but I know that it's almost impossible, my mummy also did tell me to rest awhile before continuing to study.

I asked my mum, will I gone mad from studying all these notes? She says, nope, won't one(:
And I asked her again, if I ever gone mad, how? Will mummy feel very sad? She didn't reply me though.

In the evening, after I reach home from Hans, I help mummy with dinner, and I was cutting meat(pork) when she say "my dearest daughter, 我最疼的女儿 is here helping mummy", then I told her, " mummy, if I am then I'll feel very bad" Mummy asked why? And I told her "My results are like shit"

Feeling so tired from all this pile of shit, and a sense of happiness cause it'll soon be over.

Let me have have a break, I'm suffocating!

2011-03-26T11:12:00.000+08:00

I went out to meet my baby this evening, and to have a break, all the studies are driving me insane! I lost the concentration after the first 2 paper, I hope I'll be able to study tomorrow as I'll be heading back New Town for awhile then off I go to either Hans or Mac tea garden!

Stress about STUDIES!

2011-03-25T09:36:00.000+08:00

I don't know why, but it doesn't seems that I am concentrating on the book. I felt sleepy but my body clock is tuned to sleeping when my mum wakes up. and yeah, all thanks to staying up late to revise and study.

I don't feel good, my body seems to be weaker, more tired, no concentration, short attention, temper out of control, headache, blurred mind. And all this was caused by staying up late, the most thing I'm worried of is, MY FACE! I don't wanna look like 30 when I am just 20, gosh this staying up late is making me feel like I'm old~

Life isn't great, it bad. though there's a friends which thinks I'm using my time to studies is better than wasting my time on other things, but am I born to study? No. Am I born to play? Yes.
enjoying life isn't about wasting time, it's spending time with your friends and relaxing. I don't wanna be living a tensed, hectic, busy, miserable life in such a early stage of my life. if you don't enjoy now, you can't in the future, cause what you have now, you might not have it in the future as people tend to grow old and loosing their sense of courage, and fun.

So why not enjoy now and work later? I know that studies is an very important thing in Singapore, no cert=no work. But the life's here in Singapore everyday, passes so fast that we couldn't even remember what we did during times when we had fun. I know companies love efficiency and effectiveness.

Man~ how I hate my school, I haven't even receive my result yet and it's the last paper I took like 3 months ago. what took them so long? That lady who are in charged of my class said that the result will be sent via mail to our home by the last week of school before study week, but, I waited for like two to three weeks later, letter still not receive yet. WHERE'S MY RESULT?

Well, what am I going to do when I graduate?
I have no idea, might be heading to find some work. And if I had to take sub-paper, probably would have find some service job but I'm not into promoter. I'm not good in talking and memorizing the detail of product. Is there any ulu(quiet but still little bit of customers), shopping mall which doesn't have much customers? Can slack there too, but yeah too early to plan now, besides I have four more paper to study, man I hate exams.

2011-03-08T14:07:00.002+08:00

I felt so useless. Never in my life that I felt this way but yup, I am useless. I just can't understand why three of my sister is so clever but I am not? Mummy gave birth to a useless child, I'm sure she would be very upset if she knows that. I just don't know what is wrong with me, things that shouldn't be said, all blurted out just because I'm angry. I've totally changed. I no longer know the Chan Mei Juan now. I have accomplished nothing in my life, and now what, studies. I really hope that this thing would end, but it doesn't seems that way.

2011-02-28T14:46:00.003+08:00

Damn those assignments, for making me stay up late at night. I hate assignments more than anyone else, it's because assignment is alright, but when it comes along with presentation, itt'll become "what the hell".

2011-02-27T15:35:00.003+08:00

This few days I have been doing projects/assignments. And after that had to study for the four subjects and finally until it's over at 9 April 2011(this is for re-test)

As I kept on thinking, whether will I succeed in life? Or will I won't? What will I be doing then, I have not a clue. But I keeps telling myself that, no matter how hard is it, I had to venture out and give everything a try, there's a word for it, you'll gain nothing if you didn't try. I'll know nothing if I keeps standing behind the line of venturing in to an adults world. I couldn't make myself believe that "Mei Juan, there'll be no harm working, and you're an adult now, have to go and venture if not, you'll regret it". My mind will run wild from hearing the news, "i am getting older, work is a must now, or you have been hired, or work work work and more work."

I am 20, and I am still afraid of working life, I'm often scared because I thought that if I did something wrong the manager or the boss are going to scold me, and that proven wrong by my sister. I am not a bold type person, who like venturing and exploring.

My mum always tell me, "if a person didn't work, there'll be no income, and therefore, he'll starve to death", when I am young, I will get frightened because of that, I knew I don't have the heart to work since then.

2011-02-26T17:20:00.002+08:00

I think about a lot of thing all the time, like example, how's life ten years later. What will we be doing then, will we earn lots of money?

I am currently at Singapore Polytechnic, but I am going home soon cause it's raining and I have no umbrella, didn't bring along because my bag is damn heavy.

2011-02-23T18:48:00.002+08:00

I'm afraid, this semester also did have four subject and I don't know whether I could handle the stress and the amount of studies or not. My project is another problem, I have not started anything yet. Shit.

2011-02-16T16:04:00.005+08:00

Didn't blog for a long time already. It is because life is getting more and more boring, so didn't had much to talk about. Thinking of so much things in life makes my head hurts a lot. Imagine, in just a few more months away, I'll soon be going for interviewed for work. I seriously gets bored over this, and gosh, my result haven't know yet, I don't know that I'd pass or I had to retake for sub-paper. This school service isn't that impressive though. I don't even know why did I choose this school in the first place.

Life will be more hectic later on, I'll have to rush for projects and maybe presentation. I really hate presenting in front of all people.

I am getting bored already, but I'm all right, just have to paced down on my speed for awhile and take some rest, everything will be fine I guess, it has to be.

Now, I just wanna relax and read some books, and take a nap.

MEIJUAN

2011-02-08T12:07:00.001+08:00

It's anothr boring day ahead. I am only looking forward to Sunday, cause my second sis is flying 5to Sydney and I,m going Livia's house then after that we're going out but haven't decided where to go yet. I'm so excited!

2011-02-01T17:52:00.002+08:00

YAY! New year is here, can wear new clothes already. Really can't wait to wear all the new clothes! But....boring thing is going to relative house, and I've downloaded show to watch and I'll download my whatsapp back!

2011-01-26T18:20:00.003+08:00

Raining this days huh. Weird weather we had here in Singapore. Yupp, in a few months time, I'll be working and I don't think I ever got the chance to blog anymore.

In some way, I started to dislike people who claim themselves as anti--social, well you can say that it's right. And, though I don't care much but I can't put it aside. Nevermind.

I don't think there's ever people here reading my blog, so I could say or talk whatever, and anything I want. Gosh, is there some way to shut a person up? My neighbour has been screaming for the pass few hours and they are not shutting up! That is such nuisance.

2011-01-14T18:49:00.003+08:00

Happy birthday to myself, though it's a bit late to say that. But it's never too late to wish myself.

Frankly speaking, it's a bit bored to spent the whole day at home since the weather is like crap. Today doesn't even seems like my birthday, isn't the birthday girl has all the credit of not doing stuff? I still have to wash the bed sheet. I know I shouldn't be complaining so much, but I guess women period is coming that makes me got angry for little things. Sisters are not coming home for dinner, might as well stay out the whole night, I shouldn't have said today will be celebrating with family though. 20 years and what have I contribute to this family? Nothing I guess.

Why I can't feel the happiness that every girl would feel on their birthday?

Birthday, is it good or bad? I can never know anymore. No, I don't think that this is a very good year for me though.

Every year, when it reaches my birthday, I would be very happy cause there's cake to eat, behave like a little girl when she saw the cake. I would be very happy cause my family is there to celebrate with me, but I don't think that's gonna happen this year. Wasn't that sad? But nevertheless, tomorrow I'm celebrating with my cliques.

And I'll find excuses not to attend my sis birthday dinner too, for crying out loud.

People used to say birthday is one of the important days for you, as you grow older, you'll get wiser. Is it true in the first place?

2011-01-12T22:04:00.002+08:00

Is 2011 a good year? If it is, why is there so many things happening at so many different places?

Anyway, my birthday is less than 2 days. I don't care how old am I, as long as I am young at heart.

2011-01-03T22:26:00.003+08:00

School started and I've already felt the boredom, and I wonder what my 2 other teachers look like?

I can't believe that I am turning 20 in less than two weeks!

And Chinese New Year is coming, don't know what clothes to buy too. It's a headache when it comes to shopping for new year's clothing.

Then again, visiting relatives house can sound fun but it is very boring for me. Gosh.

Everything seems like a fairytale, time passes so fast that I almost forgotten days that I was having fun.

2010-12-27T23:44:00.002+08:00

I missed my Gfs, Darling and Boyfriend out of a sudden. Like I didn't met them for very very long. Went Johor yesterday, I don't think it was a good trip, cause I ended up having headache, body ache, and stomach upset, as I didn't ate in Johor, I think I was choosy on food. Didn't bought anything except for a heels. Reach Singapore at 5 though i think, took bus to Kranji MRT station, then take MRT back Dover to change bus bck home as it was raining in Singapore. As I am not feeling very well, my second sis brought me home then went back to fetch mum. Ate medicine first before telling baby that I was back Singapore.

I wanna thank god for giving me such a wonderful home, families, Darling, boyfriend, girlfriends, and cliques. They are a wonderful thing or person to me, important as well.

Amazing as it is, no matter when we've met up, a day or few days later I'll start to miss you again, like we haven't met up for years. Things have changed the way we live our lives, or the way we do things. But it'll never change the love I had for you.

I kinda felt weird as this holiday seems weird. I don't know how to explain but it really feels weird.

2010-12-21T15:25:00.002+08:00

Last paper on Thursday and I'm FREE!

I really misses those sweet and romantic times with you, baby.

I wonder if that'll would come back to us, but I am sure it certainly will.

Times like we used to walk by the river together, in an evening sun.

Times like when we were happily chatting with no worries.

Times like when we went for a movie, in an couple seats.

We're very sweet at least for me.

I miss you even though we've just met last Sunday.

Times when I'd fall sick, you would be very worried.

Times when I was down, you'd cheer me up.

Sometimes, I really miss your cold jokes, those which you always says during ITE.

And I want to go back ITE (Chua Chu Kang) with you one day.

Now that my exams are finishing, I guess I could do all this with you.

And the good news is, I 3 Jan then start lesson, so I can accompany you!

Loves!

2010-12-18T02:15:00.003+08:00

One of my favourite song!

Grenade by Bruno Mars

Easy come, easy go
That's just how you live, oh
Take, take, take it all,
But you never give
Should of known you was trouble from the first kiss, Had your eyes wide open -
Why were they open?
Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, you did
To give me all your love is all I ever asked, Cause what you don't understand is
I’d catch a grenade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah , yeah)
You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah) Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ; But you won't do the same

No, no, no, no
Black, black, black and blue beat me till I'm numb Tell the devil I said “hey” when you get back to where you're from
Mad woman, bad woman,
That's just what you are, yeah,
You’ll smile in my face then rip the breaks out my car
Gave you all I had

And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, yes you did
To give me all your love is all I ever asked Cause what you don't understand is
I’d catch a grenade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah , yeah)
You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah) Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ; But you won't do the same

If my body was on fire, ooh You’ d watch me burn down in flames You said you loved me you're a liar Cause you never, ever, ever did baby...
But darling I’ll still catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah , yeah)
You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah) Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain, Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby ; But you won't do the same.
No, you won’t do the same,
You wouldn’t do the same,
Ooh, you’ll never do the same,
No, no, no, no

2010-12-17T15:43:00.002+08:00

Don't know what's wrong with my blogger, cause I can't seem to change my font colour. I know black it's a bit boring but I'll just have bear with it then.

Bored day I have today, slept until 2 plus I guess then cook maggie, then ta-da here I am blogging.

Facebook is so boring, I shall look for games that I used to play in Facebook later. Then study!

2010-12-16T18:30:00.002+08:00

2 down, to go.

Econs and PBM next, hope i really can make it although I kinda gave up on marketing. I think i have to save up 30 dollars for sub-paper.

It' been 4 weeks since I really have a proper shopping.

Sis say she bringing mummy and me to KL, but she haven't state when. So I am not confirm whether I am still going.

2010-12-01T16:34:00.002+08:00

Only 12 til my exam are here, don't have much time to go out and play anymore, 4 subject to learn at once, you tell me is it stress? I can't find the motivation to continue studying anymore, but I shall put Universal Studio as my motivation( I really hope this would work out). Things aren't the same anymore, days of working is getting nearer and nearer, I can't imagine me working in a hotel man! Although it seems fun but it's also quite stress, at least for me. I hate interview, I believe everyone has the same reason, being interview by the manager or who, is very stress, you have to answer then the answer that you think it's correct. Further more, it is not 100% that you'll get the job if you're a fresh grad. A lot of things are going through my mind now.

Baby, I think I can only meet you up after my exam, cause I have to study for my exam and I don't think I can make it either, so sorry baby:(

MEIJUAN

2010-11-26T18:41:00.002+08:00

Finally finished my projects, but coming up are 4 back to back EXAMS! Gosh, life's are hard nowadays. I wanna watch Repunzel the movie:/ Feels good after handing up the paper, although I didn't do all that is required to do.

I always feared that the world would turn into zombies as I wake up another day, this fear have not overcome me yet though since after I watched Resident Evil. Days aren't so relaxing yet, calmness hasn't decided to come to me yet too.

I pitied those stray cats on the streets, one night, late night, I was clearing up the bin then I looked out of the window, I saw nobody on the street except for one poor little cat, walking under the block alone. Owners who threw/left them on the street just because of some stupid reasons are so irresponsible, you bought the cats with your own money, then threw them away, gosh what are you guys thinking man? Think for them too, if your mother threw you out of your house

and say:

1) I got not enough cash to feed you.

2) sorry, your out of the trend now!

3) I don't want you anymore.

4) You're such a nuisance

5) I'm throwing you away cause you're no use to me.

6) You keep giving me troubles.

7) You're not friendly.

8) You are a serious trouble maker.

9) I don't think I buy you is a correct decision.

10) I was being force to buy you, and now, decisions are mine so, I am going to throw you away.

If you think this is a very wise choice, think about it. What if your mother or whoever is taking care of you now, wanted to leave you on the street? Have you guys ever think about your pets? How are they going to survive on the streets? Cats are dying everyday, some out of starvation, some out of abused, some out of sickness. Have you been kind to your pet today? Be kind, love your pets like they are your sister, best friends and even daughter. Be an animal lover!

2010-11-24T19:31:00.003+08:00

Last third day for submission of projects, which includes Marketing and Information of Travel, Tourism. Gosh, it's like so many things clashed together, didn't experience this before though. And guess what, I haven't finish doing it yet. But I'm just giving myself a break. I really need a break man. 4 project just pass and 4 exam coming right up. What kind of life is this?

Went Singapore Polytechnic today to meet Baby to do my project but apparently I didn't finish. Then went back to my school to pay my school fee, then it took quite awhile. Finally met up with Girlfriend Julia, she came my home.

I wonder how those adults working in office, deals with work and live in working life?

2010-11-19T01:52:00.002+08:00

I had the most scariest dream of my life. Now that I thinks of it, I will still feel scared.

I dreamt that I was on a holiday with my family but the place looks more like Singapore, then I was using a com in a shop when my family left me alone then I got panic and ran after them, forgetting to log out of my facebook account. When I met up with my family, I told them I will be back soon, so I went back to the shop and log out but soon after I do so, the shop keeper closes the gate, so I asked him why, he told me the girl walking pass the shop is up to no good, You can never let her see you. So I worried of my family as they does not know this, I ran out as fast as I could but I was in another place with my current classmates, the girl is still there. And it seems to be chasing us. We got up Jasyin's car and drove off. Then we saw her inside a SBS bus, taking bus to chase us. Then when we reach a bungalow, my classmates all gone, but now I see my secondary classmates, the girl is inside the house with us, and she turn into a horrifying creature. Julia and me was trap in the house when others have all escape from the house, but Julia's boyfriend, Yong Min wants us to run out as fast as we could so that he could bomb the girl to death, and it did happen. The bomb went off and we didn't see her after that.

Gosh, what's with the dreams I had nowadays?

MEIJUAN

2010-11-18T00:22:00.002+08:00

Today was awesome although baby and I were tired. We had a long day, he went school to do his project and I, stayed home to do housework and finish up my part of the project. It's very tiring to do project and not knowing how am I going to finish the rest of it, like I still have a Marketing Project, Econ's Project, and I gotta finish the last part of ITT project, shit! Gosh, I am so gonna be dead if I never pass up on time! But in the meanwhile, I was thinking of my future, am I really going to work in a hotel? Or in a Travel agencies? Or Tourism board? Tourism board sounds fun though hotel have a bright future. It's a hard decision to make, I don't even know whether I can pass this semester. I guess I have to start studying if not I'll regret it. Hope and pray for the best, MeiJuan!

Goodluck on that, and I'll definitely need that.

MEIJUAN

2010-11-09T16:50:00.002+08:00

I wanna treasure someone who changed my life since we started out together. We had a lot of fun together and we share joy, tears, sadness, and jealousy.

The one whom I missed everyday and night.

The one whom I needed the most when I had trouble.

The one whom I loved most and I had never loved anyone like this before.

The one whom I wanna stay with, until our hair grows grey and until it turns white.

The one whom I'll get excited when we're going out together.

The one whom loved me a lot.

The one whom worries about me when I feel down.

The one whom will accompany me where ever I go.

The one whom would take care of me when I am sick.

The one whom borrowed my your shoulder when I'm tired.

So I am never going to let go of you so easily, you could say I'm selfish but, for love, yes I am.

You better be reading this:) Chua Yong An

The weather nowadays is so cool in the morning. It's raining this morning, I slept til I was nearly late for class. But thank god, that Nizah(my PBM II teacher), starts lesson quite late. And guess what, he's teacher those thing that PBM I learnt before, and I still prefer Suma!

I'm so tired despite listening to Korean song(hip-hop).

MEIJUAN

2010-11-08T16:35:00.002+08:00

11++ days to due date of project for both individual and group but we haven't start anything yet. Feeling bored, as I've only stayed home for an hour? Boring it is!

Listening to Love Love Love by FT ISLAND now! I wanna download show to watch later. If not, I would really bored out myself!

MEIJUAN

2010-10-28T18:56:00.001+08:00

Bought a collectable item for baby, but I don't know whether he will like it mah. I really hope that he'll likes it leh. It's going to be our 1 year in just another 4-5 days, oh my god, it's like damn fast okay.

MEIJUAN

2010-10-27T22:05:00.002+08:00

Older sis flew to Taiwan already, ask her to buy something for me i wonder will she buy?

Second sis coming back this friday from Vietnam, boring. She comes back equal to lots of nagging. Project due next month and I haven do anything yet.

I don't know what happen to me nowadays, I seems hot tempered, I myself don't even know why so don't bother asking me why. It might be the weather or project. I don't know whether other feel the same too.

MEIJUAN

2010-10-25T23:21:00.000+08:00

FT ISLAND NEW SONG(JAP)

2010-10-24T23:26:00.003+08:00

Projects and assignments are causing my headache nowadays. One after another, it's like so irritating when you have one then another lecturer gave one later on. Just feel like throwing all the assignment away and burn it. Or better still, throw the teacher away. But guess what, after so long I'm still stuck with content page. Baby playing games now, haven't finish drawing his drawing yet. And guess what he have to pass up on Tuesday, hmm. Downloading new games through apps store in my Itouch, so cool to have the ITouch 4, thanks baby:) I Love You!

MEIJUAN

2010-10-22T22:42:00.004+08:00

Every night it’s all the same
You’re frozen by the phone
You wait, something’s changed
You blame yourself every day
You’d do it again
Every night

There’s something ’bout love
That breaks your heart
Whoa oh oh oh
It sets you free

There’s something ’bout love
That tears you up
Whoa oh oh oh
You still believe
When the world falls down like the rain
It’ll bring you to your knees
There’s something ’bout love that breaks your heart
Whoa oh oh oh…
But don’t give up
There’s something ’bout love

When you were young
Scared of the night
Waiting for love to come along
And make it right
Your day will come, the past is gone
So take your time
And live and let live

There’s something ’bout love
That breaks your heart
Whoa oh oh oh
It sets you free

There’s something ’bout love
That tears you up
Whoa oh oh oh
You still believe
When the world falls down like the rain
It’ll bring you to your knees
There’s something ’bout love that breaks your heart
Whoa oh oh oh…
But don’t give up
There’s something ’bout love

Don’t fight
Don’t hide
Those stars in your eyes (in your eyes)
Let em’ shine tonight
Let em’ shine tonight

Hang on
Hang in
For the ride of your life
It’s gonna be alright
Hold on tight

There’s something ’bout love
That breaks your heart
Whoa oh oh oh

There’s something ’bout love
That breaks your heart
Whoa oh oh oh
It sets you free

There’s something ’bout love
That tears you up
Whoa oh oh oh
You still believe
When the world falls down like the rain
It’ll bring you to your knees (to your knees)
There’s something ’bout love that breaks your heart
Whoa oh oh oh…
But don’t give up
There’s something ’bout love

Whoa oh oh oh..
Set’s you free
There’s something bout love
That tears you up
Whoa oh oh oh
You still believe
When the world falls down like the rain

2010-10-20T16:30:00.002+08:00

I'm so pisseed by Facebook problem, shouldn't facebook allow users to have the own name and lenght they wanted? What would users think when they placed a stupid rule or something? This is not giving user any freedom of what name they wanted to put, or facebook is controlling the names only? That is so lame. It's so much like when you're in school full of rules.WTH! I am getting sick of facebook, and starting to hate it as much as I hate my enemies. Shouldn't facebook think of the users?

2010-10-18T22:41:00.002+08:00

It's the most boring thing in life, and do you know what is it? It's presentation! God! It's just damn boring larh. I would rather want the teacher to give class test than this. Imagine the whole class staring at you, when you don't even know some of them. And guess what, I bet some of them in my class didn't liked me. Siaoo liao larh! I don't really feel like presenting, I felt stressed, uncomfortable, and uneasy.

MEIJUAN

Self-study day is boring.

2010-10-08T14:22:00.004+08:00

Never been so bored before. When everyone you know are busy or schooling, and you have to do housework but you're lazy to do, what would be the outcome if you're on the net for the whole day and just too lazy to move a muscle?

Baby's working today, then tomorrow's Saturday, that would be lite session for double date. I love kite session. Even if only there's four people there, it would be still as fun! Meeting up with Julia later, i wanna buy sandal. A simple one will do. Haha, it felt happy to see lots of kite flying up high, as though your worries and stress or anything has gone up flying with the kite and there's nothing else in your mind. Investing on kite would be a nice hobby that I woukd wanna do with Baby. Once in a while, having a group for kite session is fun when you share joy with everybody.

I miss you, our 1 year is coming. I still don't know what i should get for baby. I just finish watching the show Monster VS Alien. It's funny but I wanted to watch how to train your dragon again(: Cause it's so boring to be at home.

MEIJUAN

2010-10-01T16:14:00.005+08:00

Finish school early today. Tcher let us go before 3! Nothing to do at home, my second sis took half day leave to stay home study, boring. Didn't go find baby today, I wonder is he still at the company for his pay. One more day! Just one more day to go, omg I'm so happy. 11 months are coming OMG! This is so exciting man!

The drilling just above my unit had finally stopped. It has started drilling since this morning at 10.30 I guess. It's driving me crazy, they had spent the whole day drilling but they haven't finish by the time I came back from school. The sounds seems to be drilling's on the walls, but how can someone drilled so many holes on their walls?

Been so tired this few days, slept til very late and got late for class everyday, I wonder why am I so tired when I did nothing. Time passes so fast, I can no longer count. As time passes, day passes as well. Everything seems like a dream when you think about the past now. It seems like as though you had a very long dream that is so fascinating, exciting and meaningful.

Baby, you know what? If the first year of our ITE, the FatAss didn't kinda fall in love with you, I would have do everything I wanted, like example: Be together with you, do everything together, spent our life together since then. We would have been through ups and downs together back in ITE days.

But baby, I wanna say Thank you.

Thanks for the waiting when you don't even know whether is there any chances for us both.

Thanks for everything that you have given in this relationship.

Thanks for the love you have always showered me with.

Thanks for being there for me when I needed you by my side.

Thanks for the time spent just to make me happy, and accompany me.

Thanks for being so understanding whenever I did something wrong and make you angry.

Thanks for being just you. cause what I love about is you.

Thanks for letting me know everything even if I didn't ask you.

Thanks for lending me your shoulder when I'm tired.

Thanks for everything you could think of.

I love you, baby

MEIJUAN

2010-09-29T22:47:00.002+08:00

School will be a turn off for me now. There's 3 - 4 module to study in this term, there's thick and thin textbook. Very heavy if I had to take all. It's also very tired to wake up early in the morning to have lesson at 8.15AM and lesson ends in the afternoon!

MEIJUAN

2010-09-28T17:30:00.000+08:00

Self study day today, so stayed home and slack. I still have some housework to clear, but I'm very lazy to do. Gosh I think I forgot to wash my mum's bedsheet! Nevermind, I'll wash it tomorrow then. Start lesson yesterday, can't concentrate during lesson. Teacher is also a uncle about 40-50 years old. Why are all the teachers so old?

I wanna go shopping so badly, and my dad is screaming at the 5.30 show, he's asking the character inside to go die! OMG!

11 months are coming and it's on the kite session day, hmm, but baby don't know whether he can make it or not cause he's working, then that's equal to probably never celebrate together. And that is really boring. Congratulation, Julia and Yong Min! You two has been together for 11 months today! Last long both of you:) It's very lucky you both didn't break back when it's your 8 month! If not someone would be very happy just because she said it correctly. Shoo shoo, all those unlucky words that came out from her mouth! Don't believe in every words she says.

MEIJUAN

2010-09-26T01:04:00.002+08:00

Now what? Comparing who is more childish, c'mon, the one who compare this is more childish. Fine, I don't care and I never do care about it before, for me even if I saw you on the street, I don't even wanna say Hi or Bye to you, cheater! And F.Y.I, nobody is saying about you, I don't have to explain it to you, and since when did me or my friends has ever mention your name? You are really very bold . You started all this and you're now making it up like it's our fault? God, get some life or get a real boyfriend. How's the fake boyfriend going? Is he treating you good enough, or still "quarrelling" ? Or the both of you still going secret dating? Maybe to you is exciting to have a boyfriend to be anonymous, but you didn't know how your friends hate it. Poor thing, you can't g shopping in the open or broad daylight cause your friend would see you both together, aww i really pitied that. You brought this upon yourself, if you never say all of that, maybe this won't happen. You always thought that I'm talking about you but you've guessed it wrongly, you really think that you're so unforgettable, Please!

2010-09-24T23:22:00.002+08:00

To someone who thinks her English is the best and the vocabulary she uses is correct but doesn't she know that it's not everyone will agree to that? Nobody will spell wouldn't as wldn't, it' not in the dictionary, Girl. Look out for your past tense, and your grammar! Don't spent your time looking out for other people's mistake, spent that time learning your English. For god sake, or spent your time getting your ass move with that new bought exercise thingy which you bought from OTO. Nobody will judge you if you don't judge them, and if you do then so sorry about it. Judging will not gain something in return, you would not grow smarter by that and i guarantee that. And you do not want everybody to go against you right? So stop the cheating if you're bright enough, stop back stab-ing if you're smart enough, fat-ass! Get the fuck out of me and my friends life ass-hole!

MEIJUAN

2010-09-23T14:12:00.002+08:00

Went celebrate lantern festival last night, it was fun but i felt bad leaving my mum home alone without having dinner with her, lantern festival was suppose to have the whole family gathered but instead I left her home.
Sent yuki off for grooming this morning, woken up by the thought of whole world turned into disgusting zombies, and thinking that I was the only one survived but not for long? Haha, I scare myself and ends up getting fightened! LOL, very silly of me. But what if it happens? What if you're the only one survive? I think I scare to death more then died of hunger!
MEIJUAN

2010-09-22T15:28:00.003+08:00

I'm missing baby very suddenly which I don't usually felt so strong. It feels like as though I've never met him up for months, which I just met him yesterday. It was so boring to be at home alone. And I never took my lunch today, was so hungry now. My home doesn't stack food that could be eaten instead, my home stacks detergent. Detergent that washes clothes, plates, and body. None that could be eaten. I'm starving like I've never been eating from last month. Oh God, I still have to go ghim moh tonight to celebrate Lantern Festival. But how was i going to take my dinner if it starts at 7.30? I was kinda piss-ed for a moment, my dog's stomach have been growling for ages and yet she don't wanna take her food. I don't feel quite right today, I think I'll stop here.

MEIJUAN

2010-09-21T23:11:00.003+08:00

Facebook is having problem again, boring. Tomorrow is lantern festival, everybody's celebrating and having mooncake! Went vivo today to buy clothes, met up with baby for lunch together and we went shopping for 1 hour. Baby accompanied me to Forever 21, Cotton On and Guardian. We have alot of fun! Baby returns work and I went Mac to grab something to drink. Met up with Esther after that cause they're at vivo too. They went sentosa earlier on, to get themselves sun-tanned. Boring, boring, boring. Nothing to do, nothing to surf. Singapore so small, shopping centre all walked and shop before. Its really boring!

MEIJUAN

2010-09-19T23:34:00.003+08:00

Another busy Sunday, went Vivo like again today to buy moon cake for lantern festival. Bought a durian one for ourselves. I went over best denki for awhile to look for baby there, but he was serving customer so I pretended to be one of the customer that's looking for camera. BUT, my plan fail, he actually recognize me! Of course he recognize me, I'm his girlfriend! Haha, I think my holiday is coming to an end? No longer staying at home whole day?

MEIJUAN

2010-09-16T22:41:00.002+08:00

I went Vivo with my older sister and Julia. I finally bought the skirt i wanted, my older sis bought it for me although I wanted to pay S$15 on my own. It's very bored to be at home doing nothing. Haiish, finished watching show feels like suddenly very free.

MEIJUAN

2010-09-15T16:18:00.003+08:00

I finally finished watching Personal Taste, it's a nice show indeed. Lee Min Ho is very handsome in this show, and the girl look very pretty after she turned to a women! I still misses both the song and the show very much!

I don't know why but I really don't like her being a fan of FT ISLAND! Freak, this feeling hasn't go away yet! I'm still bothered by this, you could say it's just too sensitive but after looking at her face or looks you'll get what I mean but luckily she never liked my Seung Hyun! I know it's bad for me to say this but when you don't like it means you really don't it! I know that FT ISLAND is a band and I have no control over fans that liked them but once you know the person whom you don't like had a liking on the band you loved, you'll get angry or whatsoever right?

MEIJUAN

2010-09-14T22:34:00.003+08:00

Life is alright throughout the whole two weeks of holiday, been watching Personal Taste for the whole of this two weeks. Nothing to do at home, Baby's working in Vivo so at least I could go down and visit him while Shopping. I wanna buy skirt, tops and dress so much! Saturday having a steamboat gathering

Been together with Baby for 10 month, 1 week and 5 days already. Days passes so fast, two more month to our 1 year! I wonder what will it be like when it's 1 year. I think it'll be fun as it's our 1 year. For me, this relationship is what I wanted most, the previous relationship maybe it's just for the sake to time, period and date. But this relationship taught me alot of things, and makes me treasure this relationship very much. I don't know why but I feel very excited about the 1 year anniversary!

MEIJUAN

2010-09-11T23:57:00.002+08:00

I don't know why I didn't like her liking FT ISLAND. Probably you may think I'm too sensitive but I just didn't like it. I always thought she only liked Super Junior and Shinee but not Ft Island, but now she likes Hong Gi! OMG, I can't take it anymore! I quite like Hong Gi though, his vocal is strong ad I love it. I know I can't own the whole of Ft Island and I should share them with others but I just can't share it with her! How can I do that? I don't know but I just seriously don't like it, I hope that she'll never met ft island, if not ft island fainting really soon, just because of the odour! I admit that I am very bad, but that doesn't make me who I am. If I really don't liked it, That means I really didn't like it.
MEIJUAN